One of the many things that the douchebag pictured to the right fancies himself an expert on (cough! cough!) is Harry Potter. Leaving aside the issue of how pathetic it is for a grown man to expound on his blog about a fictitious teenage wizard, it's just plain creepy. Even by Caric standards.
So Ric Ric gives me this golden opportunity to publicly ridicule him. I would be remiss if I didn't take him up on it (which I did on his site, but he will most likely delete my comment later this afternoon). Here goes my parody:
Next, on "To Catch a Predator."
(Chris Hansen voiceover) Our hidden camera catches a disheveled govt professor armed with the latest Harry Potter book and a box of Trojans...
He claims he just wants to discuss the book with a 13-year-old boy, but then why the condoms and Mike's Hard Lemonade?
(Caric walks into kitchen of empty house with a grocery bag and a Harry Potter book)
CARIC (to fictitious 13 year old off camera): ...Mmyaaha! I think this new book really--ummm!--explores the hidden homoerotic dimensions to the relationship between Ron and Harry, and--ummmm!-- between Voldemort and Snape...it really--ummm!--calls into question our notions of---nyyumm!--masculinity...
(in walks Chris Hansen, with a camera crew behind him)
CARIC: Nyyaaa, oh boy!
HANSEN: Why don't you have a seat there and tell me what you're doing.
CARIC: Nyaha! Just having a discussion of the latest Harry Potter book.
(with eyebrows raised incredulously) HANSEN: With a 13 year old boy? At home alone? With a six pack of Mike's Hard Lemonade?
CARIC: Ummm! Nnyaha!
HANSEN: Well, we have your chat log here. You are "drknowitall," right?
CARIC: Um!
(reading aloud from the chat log with a look of disgust etched on his face) HANSEN: "drknowitall: let's get 2gether and measure each other's magic wands. see if they are bigger than Harry's. ;)
horny13: lol. kewl
drknowitall: do ya think Harry likes the feel of that broomstick in his crotch? :)
horny13: i know i do! lol!
drknowitall: me 2!"
HANSEN: So this was just a literary conversation?
CARIC: Ummmm!! Is someone microwaving popcorn here? I'm starting to break out in hives.
HANSEN: You're a professor of government, a parent of two underage daughters. What were you thinking?
CARIC: Aahhmm. Nnnyyaha!
Picture the rest for yourself...
3 comments:
Pablo, you are such a troll
Let's see the cursing, the prominent use of the word douchebag, and the fact the blogger id's match would mean you know exactly who Pablo is.
No, sorry timmy. I've never used the screen name "Pablo." You must have confused me with someone else who despises Caric.
So, are you one of the douchebag's disciples?
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